Life in France

A not every day story of normal people trying to live their dream in France starting at the beginning and ending?

Friday, September 30, 2005

Totally Knackered!

Today i feel older than i am! All the guests have now gone home to England and at last once again luscious and i are on our own again. It has been a VERY busy three weeks, cooking, cleaning, entertaining, taking people out sightseeing, cleaning up sh*t and to cap it all i have a cold and i reckon i caught it from one of the visitors!! Add to all of this a three day whistle stop visit to the Uk to sort out probate for the estate of luscious' mum and you can see why i am knackered. She is also tired so we need a rest....trouble is there is still a lot to be done on the house before winter closes in...maybe tomorrow we will rest a little......

You know what we mere males are like when we are not well....? I'm not that bad but just wish this would go away as i can't afford another two dozen boxes of tissues. My nose is running like a tap and i look like a snotty four year old constantly having to wipe the drips from the end of my nose! At least i am not using my sleeve! yet!

Sounds like luscious is going down with it as well so the two of us will be able to share our miseries and take the age old cure reccommended by a local village elder,, Port and Brandy followed by sex! seriously, that's what she advocated!! It may not cure it but i'm all for alternative medicine!!!

cheers for now, i am off to get the port and brandy sorted!! sniff snifff

Monday, September 19, 2005

Up to my elbows in Sh*t!

When we started to do the work on the house we decided that we would be as eco-friendly as possible. To this end we have built reed beds to recycle all the waste water from the house and installed a special toilet system that recycles the waste and turns it into compost for the garden that is safe to handle. For over a year now the toilet system has been working perfectly and the resultant compost has grown some excellent tomatoes, beans, peppers and aubergines! This has all stopped today as the system has suffered a water overload! I'm not sure how much the guests have been drinking but judging by the output of Pee it is a lot. The toilet system uses a mixture of peat and wood shavings which i add every two or three days. At the moment it looks like a liquid sludge instead of compost and i am having to scrape out the unit to clean the filters as they have become blocked. This involves putting on a pair of fetching blue extra long marigolds (gloves) getting my hands inside the chamber and scooping out the sludge. I've not had so much fun in a longtime. My only cheering thought as i dip my hands in again to move all this sh*t is that at least i am making money whilst doing it! As the saying goes, Where there's muck there's money, the other one is; I'm always in the sh*t, it's just the depth that varies! Hopefully it won't go pass the elbows as the gloves end there!

Hey ho back we go, shovelling sh*t.........

Tuesday, September 13, 2005


At last the beams are finished, yippeeee all cleaned, varnished and ready for luscious to inspect. They were finally finished at 8pm thursday just as well really as we had guests ariving on friday for 3 weeks and another set for the weekend so things have been a bit busy for a while. I am now just catching my breath before lunch and then its off to plaster a wall. Now that should be fun as i have never plastered before..... sooo catch you later and sorry it's such a short post, pictures to follow!!!!!

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

now we have this!

Two years ago we started with this.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

You just couldn't...

YOU just couldn't make this up, The carpenters men arrived on monday afternoon to start erecting the balcony. First they had to make the holes in the walls for the beams to slot into, so far so good and i know i am stating the obvious! Then they measured the beams and using a chainsaw cut them to length, no problems. Then they moved the beams onto the terrace and began putting them into place, after a couple of adjustments using the chainsaw again they were in position! Great, one happy bunny stood watching. It was agreed that if they put the beams in place i would fill in the holes around the beams and so i started sorting that out. So far so good. Wrong!!! Problem started with the question "Where are the other beams?" errr, "What other beams?" "The ones we need to do the next part of the balcony!" "Don't ask me, that's all that was delivered" long slow breath out " ahhh, we have a little problem" ALL problems in France are little no matter how big they are! Off they wandered to go and measure the offcuts from the beams knowing full well that they are NOT long enough! They are about 1 metre in length and they need two beams 3 metres long! Back they come, sit down have a discussion and then ask ME "What are we going to do?" i politely suggest that they phone their boss, explain the situation and see what he says. Out comes the mobile and call is made, i can hear the conversation, " We have a little problem , we don't have enough wood for the second part of the balcony" " How can this be, i calculated the length and the beams should be long enough and what you cut off should be long enough. How much have you left?" "1 metre!" "non, it is not possible, you should have 3 metres" By now you get the idea, there has been a miscalculation for the length..... Upshot is, they finish work for the day and have to go early the next day to get 2 x 3metres of beam from a depot 2hrs away. They arrive late morning put up the new beams and go for lunch. In the afternoon they finish putting on the walkway, i then ask them about the guard rail! Ahhh, yes,, ermmm, hmmm, guardrail errrr, yes we have to now make it! meaning....bugger we forgot about that as well.......... told you, you just couldn't make this up..... i need to lay down......